Freeze Tag/Transcript
opens in outer space. Man-Arctica is seen flying like a comet toward Earth Fanboy: Bubble Gum, Bubble Gum, in... to a ground view, with feet standing in a circle. Fanboy is pointing to everyone's feet in rhythm Fanboy: ...a dish. How many pieces do you wish on Kyle's foot Kyle: Gum? pans upward to Kyle Kyle: None for me, thank you. My orthodontist, strictly, forbids it. Chum Chum: Kyle! For the last time! It's not actual gum! It's just how we pick who's it in Freeze Tag! Fanboy Sorry, Fanboy. Continue. Fanboy: Hmm! back to the ground view, Fanboy starts pointing at everyone's feet again Fanboy: Bubble Gum, Bubble Gum, in a... foot stomps into the view, causing everyone to fall back and scream Everyone: Man-Arctica! Man-Arctica: Greetings, young earth denizens! What manner of play ritual are you performing? Chum Chum: Freeze Tag! Wanna play? Man-Arctica: Hmm? Freeze Tag? You don't mean the warrior rite of passage on the cobol ice shelf? Fanboy: Probably. How we play is: one of us becomes "it"... Man-Arctica: The eliminator, yes... Fanboy: Then, everyone else runs and hides... Man-Arctica: Mmm-hmm. The prey flees from their imminent doom, go on... Fanboy: Then, the guy who's it chases people... Man-Arctica: Stalks them... Chum Chum: Uh-huh! And when he catches them... Man-Arctica: They are eliminated with extreme prejudice! I-I understand correctly! I'll participate, but only if I, can do the annihilating. Chum Chum: Okay, but it's got to be with two hands, none of this wimpy one-finger business. Chuggy Ring a bell, Chuggy? Chris Chuggy: sadly Waaaah. Fanboy: Okay! Man-Arctica's it! Man-Arctica Now, close your eyes and count to -- eyes start flashing Man-Arctica: Florb, flap, seep, shlut. Florb, flap, seep, shlut. gets faster Florb, flap, seep, shlut. Florb, flap, seep, shlut. Florb, flap, seep, shlut. Florb, flap, seep... stop flashing FLOOOOOOP! Ready or not... Fankylechum ...here I COOOOOME! releases ice breath as Fankylechum screams, before you know it, Fankylechum is frozen in an ice chunk. The kids scream Fanboy: Man-Arctica! What have you done to Fankylechum?!? Man-Arctica: He has been eliminated! kids chatter with fear What? I counted to floop! He really should've fled in terror! Well? What are you waiting for? FLOOOOOOP! Chum Chum: Everybody...RUN! instantly run offscreen Man-Arctica: Prey has scattered. Now, the hunt may begin. Murphy on a slide and freezes him Murphy: But I wasn't playing! ice chunk slides off to the kids running down the street, Murphy's ice chunk slides by Fanboy: We can hide over there. hide behind the movie theater's box office Fanboy: It's gonna be okay. I'm sure once Man-Arctica's done entombing us all in ice, he'll probably just move on to the next planet. Everyone feel better? Show of hands. 00:15:20 creaks open That's the spirit, lenny! 00:15:23 - He didn't even say olly, olly oxen free. 00:15:27 What kind of sicko doesn't say olly, olly oxen free? 00:15:33 - Come on, lupe. 00:15:34 - Where are you going? 00:15:35 - To make man-arctica stop this silly game. 00:15:38 - And how do you plan on doing that? 00:15:40 - Uh, in case you haven't noticed, I'm cute. 00:15:44 - sighs BOYS. 00:15:47 - squawks - yells Finally, a worthy opponent. 00:15:53 yelling cawing - Uh, excuse me, mr. man-arctica, sir. 00:16:00 - Be right with you. 00:16:02 yells caws shattering guffaws Now, what can I do for you, human prey? 00:16:10 - giggles We couldn't help notice you look at little chilly-willy. 00:16:15 - So we made you a sweater. 00:16:18 - Ooh. I could use a sweater. 00:16:22 The missus likes to keep the igloo of isolation at absolute zero. 00:16:27 Mm. 00:16:28 This de-pelted animal protein does make me look rather dashing. 00:16:34 footsteps - So we don't have to make with the screaming and the running and the freezing? 00:16:38 - Sure. why not? 00:16:40 Run along, you crazy unfrozen kids. 00:16:45 sneezes - shouting screaming - sniffles This is wool. 00:16:52 Everyone knows I'm allergic to wool. 00:16:57 inhales sneezes crackling scream - You took advantage of my trusting nature. 00:17:08 sneezes - yelps - sneezing - Come on! 00:17:17 We can hide out at oz's! 00:17:19 - No, thank you. 00:17:19 This is where I part company with you buffoons. 00:17:22 I seem to have found my own way out of this kerfuffle. 00:17:25 Toodles! 00:17:27 - Kyle! 00:17:29 Kyle! 00:17:30 - It's just us now, chum chum. 00:17:33 yelping Oz, you got to help us. 00:17:35 Man-arctica's right outside. 00:17:37 - And he's crazy! 00:17:38 - So he's finally here. 00:17:41 I always knew this day would come. 00:17:44 Quickly. 00:17:46 There are preparations to make. 00:17:48 When man-arctica arrives, we've got to be ready to come at him with everything we've got. 00:17:53 banging - screams - WHAT WAS THAT? 00:17:55 - Oh, probably just mother. 00:17:57 banging .. 00:17:59 banging And a clubfoot. 00:18:01 Not a good time, mother. 00:18:02 We're kind of waiting for a deranged superhero. 00:18:06 whirring dings Hmm, odd. 00:18:10 clunking yelp screaming - growling snarls - I'll hold off man-arctica while you guys get away. 00:18:29 I got a score to settle. 00:18:32 - But-- - go now! 00:18:34 panting - It's been a long time, man-arctica. 00:18:42 - Ooh, awkward. 00:18:45 Do I know you? 00:18:47 - No. 00:18:48 But I've known you since I was a child. 00:18:51 And I've been waiting for the day when you would finally be standing before me in my shop. 00:18:56 - Let's go, talking earth manatee. 00:19:00 Bring it. 00:19:01 - Oh, I brought it, all right, all of it. 00:19:05 squeak And there's quite a lot of it, so let's get busy. 00:19:09 The first thing I'd like you to sign are these posters and comics with the gold pen. 00:19:15 Then we'll move on to the various calendars and the cereal boxes and so on and so forth. 00:19:19 distorted OKAY, SERIOUSLY, THIS IS VERY Important. 00:19:22 Make everything out to, "my most awesomest fan and bestest friend, " - I'm gonna enjoy this one. 00:19:33 inhales - No! you're ruining the posters! 00:19:41 crackling - Oh, no! 00:19:43 I think I left my wallet in there. 00:19:46 - Come on, fanboy. 00:19:47 We can't stay here. 00:19:49 gasp gasping - Oh, boy. not good. 00:19:57 - Yeah. we should go now. 00:20:00 - It's everyone we know. 00:20:03 - Not everyone. 00:20:04 At least kyle made it out. 00:20:06 Hey! 00:20:07 screaming - Want a lick from my fop-sicle? 00:20:10 screaming - screams - grunts yelping Bah. 00:20:26 screeching Boog! you got to get out of here. 00:20:29 Man-arctica's coming! 00:20:30 - He'll freeze us all if we don't hide! 00:20:33 - Yeah, right. 00:20:34 I ain't moving for nobody. 00:20:36 I'm about to shatter the longest-standing chimp chomp record in the books. 00:20:40 I'm in the zone. 00:20:43 chimes scream whirring - distorted I GOT YOU, CHIMPS. 00:20:52 Chimp, chimp, chimp chomp. I got you. 00:20:55 chuckles yelps Almost there. almost there. 00:21:00 - Ooh, he's not gonna make it. 00:21:02 - Get out of there, boog. 00:21:04 - moans - growls - whimpers Fisty, slappy, make papa proud. 00:21:12 howls pop! 00:21:18 babbling Forget about it. 00:21:23 - Floop! 00:21:25 footsteps chattering And then there were two. 00:21:36 screaming - Wait, man-arctica. 00:21:37 Before you blast us into frozen oblivion, I just want to say, big fan of your work. 00:21:42 - Well, before today. 00:21:43 - Always good to meet a fan. 00:21:46 Hopefully you'll thaw out by the time my new album drops next week. 00:21:51 guitar riff plays inhales and wheezes Oh, by golly. 00:22:03 I seem to be out of frozoxinol 9. 00:22:06 - Uh, what's that? 00:22:07 - It's a mix of slushy blue and pink chemicals that when ingested at a very low temperature produces my freezy breath. 00:22:16 You don't happen to have anything like that on your planet, do you? 00:22:20 machine rattles both: UM... 00:22:23 - Uh, nothing comes to mind. 00:22:26 - Yeah, doesn't ring a bell. 00:22:29 - Aw, shoot. 00:22:31 Well, this was a lot of fun. 00:22:33 I guess I'll go put out that warehouse fire I came down here to extinguish. 00:22:39 It's probably just embers now, sighing crackling - Should we inch our way over to the hot dog warmer? 00:23:19 - Let's. Category:Transcripts